Face to face with Ramathal

K.M.Ramathal, Chairperson, Tamil Nadu State Commission for Women speaks about the benefits of the Prevention of Domestic Violence Act …

Q: Nowadays the incidence of divorce is going up …

A: The main reason is that only now women are becoming courageous to come out of the house. Till yesterday, women, let her be a daily worker or a collector, used to accept their lot meekly. In life, both the husband and wife should have equal rights, status etc. Women have been denied these basic rights due to male domination. The media should publish reports that emphasize love. A 60-year old woman came to me for divorce! She had been patient all these years because she wanted to wait till her daughter’s marriage. Her husband has a second wife too. I spoke to her husband. Though initially he refused, eventually he agreed for divorce.

Q: Have you come across abnormal complaints in your tenure?

A: We receive different kinds of complaints. Some of them would be very trivial. Women should also be cooperative and understanding. Once, a newly married couple came to me. The girl’s father also came with them. The girl wanted to set up an independent establishment as she didn’t want to live in a joint family. But the boy, being the only child to his parents did not want to leave his parents. The girl’s father put a condition that the boy’s parents should not even visit their son or daughter-in-law for one year and should allow them to live freely. I made the girl realize that her husband’s parents had every right to want to live with their son at their age and I advised her to live in harmony with them.

Both the man and the woman have equal status, opportunity and rights in the society. Introspect yourself whenever you’ve a problem. Women should never use tears as a weapon, it will only bring disrespect. There’ll be no need for the word divorce in anybody’s life if we adopt give and take policy without sacrificing our self-respect, says Ramathal.